Intimacy Without Sex

Dear Friends,

I had two amazing angel readings in a row that brought up a powerful issue for some people and I would like to share with you some of the advice that the angels gave.

Building an intimate relationship with our life partner can be more difficult than anyone realizes.  Intimacy is our core-self and allowing another person into that vulnerable space can be frightening.  Especially when we've experienced any type of abuse from childhood or if we have deep seated fears or abandonment issues.  However, allowing the person we love to get to know us at a core level is one of the most profound ways to begin building a powerful relationship based on love and trust.

One of the misconceptions in our society is that sex is the method for being intimate with our life partner.  However, sex is also greatly misunderstood in our culture.  Sex is often used as a tool for manipulation, a tool for power struggles, for avoidance and a tool to simply experience physical relief.  None of these elements of sex have anything to do with love.  Nor do they cause healing.  In fact, manipulation, power struggles and pure physical satisfaction cause degradation of Love.

Consider that love is a living, breathing being.  It is an intelligence in the Universe.  It is a consciousness that can choose whether or not it wants to be with us.  If someone lives a destructive lifye-style than naturally Love would not want to be with that person.  If someone's home is full of sadness or fear, then Love would not want to live in that home.  What we need to do for ourselves is develop a relationship with Love itself before we engage in trying to love other people, or ask them to love us.  We need to invite Love into our lives and get to know it before we can share it with another person.

Especially in troubled relationships, ask yourself, "Do I have a strong and trustworthy relationship with Love?"  If the answer is no, then that could be one of the main reasons for the troubles in a relationship.

Yes, the responsibility lies on you!  Both parties are 100% responsible for the health of the relationship.  It's not 50/50, it's 100/100.  (And if only one partner is attempting to establish health, love and well being in the  relationship, then the whole thing won't work.)

Once trust is established with Love itself, then we can reach out to others.  We find that we have more to offer our soul mate than just mechanized sex.  Our proverbial cup is full and we find that we have something of tremendous value to offer.  We can offer healing, listening, joy, playfulness, growth and so on.  Once our own core-self is filled with the Energy of Love it can begin to heal and intimacy can be offered fully and completely.  We can share our core-self with our life partner on many different levels: physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.  The friendship can be deeper, the trust can be more fulfilling and, yes, eventually when we share the Energy of Love through sex, the sex will be better.  Without the Soul and the Energy of Love, sex is only a fleeting sensation.  It is only immediate gratification.  It can become an addiction.  However, with the Energy of Love present, sex is truly creative.  It is life changing.  It heals.  It transforms.  It generates Life Force and opens up the soul.  It utilizes all the chakras of the body instead of just the first two.

But in order for sex to be this wonderful, we first need to share our souls.  We need to share our emotions, our feelings and open up to Love.  We need awareness of Who We Are and what we're doing in life.  

We need intimacy with the Self first, and in order to get this, we need a strong relationship with the Energy of Love.  

When my daughter was 7 years old, she told me that Love was a true being and that Love was God's wife.  My daughter said that without Love, God could not create.  She said that God and Love are forever soul mates.  How profoundly correct she was!  Without Love, Life is empty.